All the Strange, Strange Seasonings

Regular readers will know that I’m a big Doctor Who fan. Inspired by Emo-Doctor’s amusing whingeing in this comic (and partly by the Tam of Rassilon), I wondered today: what would Time Lords eat at a Time Lord pizza party?

p. This is the kind of philosophical quandary that plagues me on a frequent basis. I’m deep like that.

p. Behold: the Pizza of Rassilon.

p. An image of the Pizza of Rassilon

Constructing the Seal of Rassilon–celebrated emblem of the Time Lords of Gallifrey–in cheese was easier than you might think. An image of the Seal is readily available. This was colour-inverted and scaled to fit the pre-bought pizza base, then printed out and taped to greaseproof paper. We layered sliced cheese between greaseproof paper with the Seal on top, and cut away the excess with a craft knife.

p. Template for the Seal of Rassilon of Cheese

p. Every time I go into Tescos for one thing, they don’t have it. This isn’t just a common occurrence, it’s disturbingly, statistically frequent. I’m starting to think that they do it deliberately. “Bing bong, this is a staff announcement. That guy with the cloak is heading this way. Quickly, everyone, hide all of the stuff he might want to buy”. In this case, they didn’t have sliced mozzarella, so here I’m using Gouda.

p. Also, it turns out that a craft knife is another one of those indispensable kitchen gadgets. Maybe we should do an episode on them some time.

It may interest to those of you who watched the ovens episode to know that I preheated the oven this time. To be fair, I preheated the oven mostly because it gave me something to be doing while Jehane got her craft-knife skillz on. I also spread the tomato on the pizza base. I’m more of a high-level thinker; I leave the implementation details to my staff.

p. Ten minutes in the oven, and then:

p. pajh posing with pizza, possibly

There are worlds out there where the sky is burning, where the sea’s asleep and the rivers dream; people made of smoke and cities made of song. Somewhere there’s danger, somewhere there’s injustice, and somewhere else my dinner’s getting cold, and yet somehow I’m still standing around posing for photographs. Come on Ace, we’ve got work to do.

The Consumption of Jehane of the Pizza of Rassilon

p. The last I saw of the Pizza of Rassilon was at the Gates of Elysium, where it flew into the jaws of the Nightmare Child.

p. I tried to save it.

p. (I ended up saving about half.)

And it was damn tasty, too.

And now, the necessary Legal Disclaimer of Rassilon. The Seal of Rassion is copyright © the British Broadcasting Corporation, 1974. (Of course, in 1974 it was the emblem of the Elders of Voga, the Planet of Gold, in Revenge of the Cybermen, and it only became a Gallifreyan emblem later on.) No infringement is intended, expressed, or implied. Personally, I feel that the destruction of Gallifrey during the Time War would have forced all of their political symbology into the public domain, but if the BBC lawyers feel differently, then this usage is covered by either Fair Use or Parody rights, or both–I haven’t yet decided which.

Also, anyone reading this post is encouraged to buy Doctor Who DVDs and merchandise. After you’ve bought ours