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On the icky bits

Paul
2009-02-14 19:17:00 UTC

This article speaks to me on a personal level, despite the rather shocking lack of research demonstrated about post-apocalyptic scenarios. “Never in any apocalyptic scenario in any movie I have seen – and I have seen them all – does anyone try to live off the land”, says Tanya Gold. Presumably the orignal 1970s Survivors or the 1981 BBC version of The Day of the Triffids don’t count. Or The Chrysalids or The Kraken Wakes for that matter. Or any of the Fallout series—what do you think all of those Brahmin were for? Or Strange Company’s own Rogue Farm, which even had a farm in the title.

So, despite the fact that Tanya Gold clearly knows next to buggerall about post-apocalyptic literature, she raises some interesting points. Could any of us survive in a wood after the collapse of civilization? For those of you who aren’t quite as obsessed with post-apocalyptic scenarios as I am, there are still important questiosn here. Pheasant is delicious, as we all know, but how many of you are actually willing to twist its head off with your own hands, and pull out its organs?

One of the things I like about society is that there’s always somebody willing to do the crappy jobs so I don’t have to. Tonight I’m going to raise a glass to butchers. Thanks, butchers.

Comments

Katie \| 2009-02-15 16:35:23 UTC I have butchered and eviscerated chickens. I could totally live off the land… as long as I had a hachet and a pocket knife. Twisting heads off is something I’m just not sure I could do. It seems all too possible that I wouldn’t get it on the first try and the poor bird would suffer needlessly.
Dougal Stanton \| 2009-02-15 23:18:35 UTC This comfortable attitude to doing the dirty deed oneself is why I particularly enjoyed the BBC’s recent Victorian Farm series. Unlike so many historical reality shows, especially those ghastly ones about 1950s schools that appeared a few years ago, the people doing the re-enacting were not hopelessly precious and ineffective. There were no whiners, and the appearance of bedbugs, pig’s head with brains and eyeballs in jelly, foot rot and the sloppy details of birthing lambs didn’t faze them. Seriously, if you didn’t catch it first time round, make some effort now. The entire series is on iPlayer for a week after the series ends. You’ve got until next Thursday, I think. Apart from the ill-thought-out desire to abandon everything to be labourer on a farm somewhere, the series has also motivated me to make some meat pies (I think there are some nice recipes in the River Cottage Meat Book), have a go at beer-making, and learn some hand craft like basket-weaving. Not necessarily preparation for the post-apocalyptic economy, but self-improvement nonetheless.
Dougal Stanton \| 2009-02-15 23:40:11 UTC I was also sorry to note that the Guardian article you linked failed to mention that nuclear reactors without power shut down almost immediately when the control rods are slotted into place. These things are actually designed with such contingencies in mind, ie to fail safe.
Fhtagn \| 2009-02-17 07:48:21 UTC Whilst I can (and have) kill, pluck or skin, and gut pheasants, I’ve never understood why people would want me to. Loathesome meat.
pajh \| 2009-02-17 18:57:23 UTC @Dougal: Thanks for that, I shall see if I can look for it. The article does say that reactors shut down automatically and are cooled for ``about a week’’, but I’m not sure about the claim that they’d then burst into flames afterwards.
SpudTater \| 2009-02-17 20:45:25 UTC @pajh: But of course they’ll burst into flames. Don’t you know that nuclear power is inherently evil?
Rob \| 2009-02-23 11:09:23 UTC Never in any apocalyptic scenario in any movie I have seen – and I have seen them all – does anyone try to live off the land. Uhh… Threads?

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Katie \| 2009-02-15 16:35:23 UTC I have butchered and eviscerated chickens. I could totally live off the land… as long as I had a hachet and a pocket knife. Twisting heads off is something I’m just not sure I could do. It seems all too possible that I wouldn’t get it on the first try and the poor bird would suffer needlessly.
Dougal Stanton \| 2009-02-15 23:18:35 UTC This comfortable attitude to doing the dirty deed oneself is why I particularly enjoyed the BBC’s recent Victorian Farm series. Unlike so many historical reality shows, especially those ghastly ones about 1950s schools that appeared a few years ago, the people doing the re-enacting were not hopelessly precious and ineffective. There were no whiners, and the appearance of bedbugs, pig’s head with brains and eyeballs in jelly, foot rot and the sloppy details of birthing lambs didn’t faze them. Seriously, if you didn’t catch it first time round, make some effort now. The entire series is on iPlayer for a week after the series ends. You’ve got until next Thursday, I think. Apart from the ill-thought-out desire to abandon everything to be labourer on a farm somewhere, the series has also motivated me to make some meat pies (I think there are some nice recipes in the River Cottage Meat Book), have a go at beer-making, and learn some hand craft like basket-weaving. Not necessarily preparation for the post-apocalyptic economy, but self-improvement nonetheless.
Dougal Stanton \| 2009-02-15 23:40:11 UTC I was also sorry to note that the Guardian article you linked failed to mention that nuclear reactors without power shut down almost immediately when the control rods are slotted into place. These things are actually designed with such contingencies in mind, ie to fail safe.
Fhtagn \| 2009-02-17 07:48:21 UTC Whilst I can (and have) kill, pluck or skin, and gut pheasants, I’ve never understood why people would want me to. Loathesome meat.
pajh \| 2009-02-17 18:57:23 UTC @Dougal: Thanks for that, I shall see if I can look for it. The article does say that reactors shut down automatically and are cooled for ``about a week’’, but I’m not sure about the claim that they’d then burst into flames afterwards.
SpudTater \| 2009-02-17 20:45:25 UTC @pajh: But of course they’ll burst into flames. Don’t you know that nuclear power is inherently evil?
Rob \| 2009-02-23 11:09:23 UTC Never in any apocalyptic scenario in any movie I have seen – and I have seen them all – does anyone try to live off the land. Uhh… Threads?